I saw him...
On my way to NTU, i saw him at 199 booth. One of them whom I neglected for past 5 years. I pretend I didnt notice him. Pretending is the best thing I ever can do in my whole life. My eyes are sharp and usually I notice ppl before they saw me. Of cos there are exceptional times like when she saw me and Brian in IMM last friday.
He wanted to approach me and call me but he hesitated. I saw everything from the corner of my eyes. I didnt give chance for his hestiation and board the bus as though I nv realise his existence. He sms me straightway after I board the bus. I anticipated it. Few casual sms-es and our life went back to usual. These 5 years, I nv told them the reason why I walked out of them.
The fact that I felt inferior to them. In terms of financial background and academic studies. I wasnt able to pursue what they enjoy doing/buying/going at that time. I was academically weak among them. Weakest.
Hence, I walked out of them 5 years ago. They tried v hard to ask me out but usually I declined it. As time goes by, I realised our mentality and interests had changed. I find it a challenge to meet up and chat. I attempted accepting a gathering once during this June and I felt uncomfortable. It's not tough to ask me out for a gathering or a simple dinner. I always go out with most friends. But I nv say it's easy to have me sit down with you for a simple dinner on the other hand.
Comfortable. That's what I'm looking for.
I want to feel comfortable with you and myself.
Things have come to this stage and we are having our own life.
I'm sure you guys are living well, juz like I do.
Let's keep things continue this way.
Anyway, advance Happy birthday to..
1.GHH,
2.Sze Wei,
3.Brian
It's time for me to return to NTU soon.
I'm nt bringing you along in my mind this time.
Goodbye.
posted by liting @ 10:07 pm
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