last day of ssl
i tot i can control my emotions well...n i really tot eveything will be fine today...i din manage to fall into much sleep last nite regardless of hw tired i was..in the end..i got a headache n no choice but to take panadols n sleep for few hours...it's a miracle i woke up at 9am today..n i lie on my bed for 1 hr b4 i got up...till then...i tot i m fine...i was smsing ssl in the morning cos he asked me to tell him the time i will be looking for him wif zchen's album...n i told him to sms me wen he finished his lesson at 3pm...i went to sch to study as usual...getting my zchen new album of course...i waited for ssl sms...till 4pm....no news from him...and i gave him an sms....he called me...and told me he's tight up wif sth...and suggest me going into his office,login into his com n rip those music for him...perhaps both of us were too rush and too rash...he gave me the password but i cant login...in the end...i gave him a call n he told me he will call me once he finished wif everything...
it's was till 6.05pm finally i saw him walking towards our table...he asked if i still wanna go into his office and rip the music..i say sure...and he told me to give him 10 min to clear up some room....i was joking wif him n said'eh....if u late than 10min...muz get punished!' ....wonder hw he reacted...he crossed his hands n pretending to pull his ears n jump...n asked me..'punish lidad?'...and for a moment i was laughing at him n i tot he was cute..
he got down in 10 min time n i went into his office...den i saw kevin robert saying him...standing outside i already guess it's abt the pc login problem...true la...both of us were at fault...cos ssl shldnt gave me his pw to allow me to login cos i m juz a student...n i m at fault too....i shld tink twice b4 i do anything..n i went in...juz wen kevin robert came out of the room...i ask him if kevin robert was unhappy...n he say yes...but i tink we din care much abt kevin robert ...
we ran into a problem...he cant rip the music cos kevin robert haf to lock the room soon and he dunhaf any key...den he told me..."nw this is call shan qiong shui jing" n he tot he wasnt fate to listen to my favorite singer...he take a look at zchen album n i told him this album zchen wasnt gd looking...u noe wad he said...he said that not good looking reflects true sth..i cant remember..l...'in the end...i decided to lend him my zchen album to rip...n he wanted to matchmake xiao dao n me together cos i told him i haf been eyeing xiao dao...n he said..since nxt tue he going out wif them..he will ask xiao dao to return me...n i went crazy....
i pass him the cds and told him to take gd care of it..he assure me he will cos he noe it's precious...he thx me and i bid a bye to him b4 leaving..the picture of him smiling seems to be capture in my mind...i left the sch after that...and it was so hard for me to board the coming train but i juz board it..i lost my soul...
on the way home...it wasnt ez for me...finally i haf to admit i wun be seeing him anymore...i got home..was trying to keep myself occupied so that i wun feel sad...but too bad...even wen i m doing the pic logbk...ears listening to zchen's new album..my mind was all on the mermories i had...n tears really ran out non-stop...perhaps some of u dun understand y i react so strongly that he's leaving...he's juz a lecturer...i m juz a student...
but there r juz too many mermories wif him...since the first email till he's leaving...he was once my poly lecturer hu taught me cep,hu help me wif tutorial qns,hu type out tutorial ans for me in the email for me wen i requested,to mark that past yrs paper i done(even though he was very bz that time),hu wished me gd luck for ct/exams,whom i went home wif a couple of times,who motivated me alot,who shares alot wif me,hu has similar things wif me,hu is the same surname wif me,hu is so frenly n sincerely in helping students,hu believe in me that zchen's songs r nice n he wanted to try listening...n lastly,hu chased me at orchard road tere that stunned cody they all...these r things that i had but not others have it...
comparing the chocolates he gave to b2....i tot the chasing scene he gave me was a mermorable one...comparing to other ppl,i tot i m more fortunate than them..i had alot of things that they all wun experience..
juz too many things...that even i start typing out sth...i will juz cry...i always remember wad he said...life has to go on...i told myself,he may haf left us..but i m still keeping his attitude towards everything and everyone in my heart..he's juz so sincere...i wanna learn from him..i still keeping the mermories he gave me,his smiles....everything...i hate to say gdbye n i definately need a shoulder to cry upon now...but...it's time i still grow up from this departure of him...sad yet so touching...
i'll be fine...dear god....i'll be fine...
posted by liting @ 1:40 pm
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